Loss of twins Emma Rose and Abigail Grace

After our loss, this was written in memory of our beautiful daughters, Emma Rose and Abigail Grace, who are now with God.

My husband and I found out we were pregnant in November of 2005, and were really excited to have a baby born in the summer.  We went for our first doctor’s appointment in January and they did an ultrasound to make sure the due date was correct.  That was when we found out we would be having twins.  We were so excited yet scared out of our minds at the same time.  How would we take care of 3 children under 3 years old at one time?

Everything was going well, so we thought, and had another appointment at 14 weeks where the babies looked to be healthy and their hearts were beating away. There were happy little feet all over the ultrasound.  It was a few weeks later we would have the worst day.  It was February 13th, I will not have a liking for Valentine’s day anymore, when we went for our next doctor’s appointment.

The Doctor was running late and everything seemed fine.  Then I sat on the examination table for the ultrasound and knew something was wrong.  The Doctor did an ultrasound and could not find a heartbeat.  I was sick, I couldn’t help but think how could this happen to me?  I did everything right, I didn’t drink caffeine, I even watched my sugar intake.

On February 14th, we went to the delivery unit of the hospital.  And they did another ultrasound.  I prayed the enitre night before that something must have been wrong with the ultrasound machine and it just wasn’t working right.  They did the ultrasound and the result was the same bad news.  There was no heart beats.  We had lost our twins.  They had passed away around the 15th week, shortly after I had seen them dancing on the ultrasound.  Our twins had suffered from TTTS.  It caused both babies to have heart failure.

I gave birth to our beautiful daughters on February 15th, 2006.  Their names were Emma Rose, and Abigail Grace.  They will forever be in our hearts.

Emily

Losing Multiples

In October 2005, my husband and I were so excited to find out I was pregnant. After two previous miscarriages, the doctor sent me for my first ultrasound at seven weeks. To our surprise we found out that we were expecting twins. This wasn’t too much of a shock since we already have four year old fraternal twins girls and were told our chances of having twins again were quite high.

My doctor then sent us for another ultrasound and we got another shock. I was twelve weeks pregnant and the radiologist started to do the ultrasound and couldn’t believe what she was seeing. She had told us that she had never seen this before and was in total shock. I was scared at this point because of our previous miscarriages so I asked if everything was okay with the two babies. She said they were fine but there are actually three babies. We were having triplets!

Baby B had been hiding on the first ultrasound. We found out that Baby A and Baby B were in the same sack, which meant they were identical and Baby C was in its own sack which meant that he/she was fraternal. We were so excited. We always wanted a big family but couldn’t believe it was happening with just two pregnancies and no fertility drugs. When I went to see my doctor, he said I would be going for ultrasounds every two to four weeks because of the high risk factor with carrying triplets.

At sixteen weeks we went for another ultrasound and everything seemed to being okay. Baby A was slightly bigger than Baby B so they were a little concerned about (Twin-to-Twin Transfusion Syndrome) TTTS. Baby C was right on schedule. They told us they would watch this [TTTS] and there were procedures they could do if need be. The doctor did not seem too worried about it and said to come back for another ultrasound in four weeks.

At twenty weeks we went for another ultrasound and had another shock. The doctor came in, put his hand on my knee and said there is no easy way to tell you this but Baby A and Baby B had passed away but Baby C was doing fine. They figured it had just happened within the last three to five days and there was really nothing they could have done. They told us that Baby A was taking from Baby B which is called TTTS. It was so hard to believe that this was really happening. On the ultrasound they looked fine, they were two fully formed little babies but their little hearts just stopped working. We were devastated. It was so hard first we were told twins, then triplets and now we only have one. We know we have to stay positive for the little guy that is staying so strong for us but it is so difficult after losing multiples already. The doctors told us the Baby C is oblivious to what was going on and expect him/her to go to full term or close to it.

I didn’t want to know what I was having when I found out I was having triplets but after finding out this terrible news I needed to hear something positive so we found out that Baby C is a boy. We didn’t care whether it was a boy or a girl, we just needed some happy news. I am now 26 weeks pregnant and Baby C is still doing well. They were worried about me going into pre term labor but so far so good. I have days where I don’t want to get out of bed but have to be strong for my two little girls and my beautiful baby growing inside. We have good days and bad days but reading other peoples stories have really helped me to stay strong for my little boy who is truly a blessing. If we had not found out we were having triplets and just twins we would not have a baby right now that is developing so well and doing great. God has given us five precious gifts.

My two angels are in heaven now looking down watching over us. My two four year old girls are amazing and cannot wait to meet their new little brother, whom should be arriving in June 2006.

Rhonda (Edmonton, AB)

I’m 28 years old and have always wanted a large family

I’m 28 years old and have always wanted a large family. My husband and I had difficulty conceiving our first child and finally, after 7 months of fertility drugs, I was pregnant. I had an uneventful pregnancy and a wonderful, healthy daughter. So when Ashley was almost 2, we were ready for baby #2. And now that we knew which drug worked for us, we thought it would be easy…but there was nothing easy about this pregnancy.

The drug that worked for our first was no longer on the market so we had to try something else. It worked on the second try and at our first sonogram, we saw 4 sacs. I became hyperstimulated, OHSS, from the fertility drug and was put on bedrest for 3 weeks in my first trimester. Once the OHSS finally resolved, I continued to be closely monitored as high risk. My doctor asked me to consider a reduction as I would not be able to carry quadruplets to term. But, at my 11th week sonogram, I thought that decision had been made for me because only 3 had heart beats and continued to grow. So I was having triplets and I couldn’t be more excited. I always wanted 4 children, I was just going to have them closer than I had thought.

At 21 weeks, I had a regular appointment at the high risk unit. They did a sonogram to finish the level 2 since all 3 didn’t cooperate last time. I already knew I was having  2 boys and a girl. The tech measured my cervical length and got the doctor. He said it was too short, about 1/8 in, and I needed to go right over to the hospital. I was shocked and so scared…I had no idea, but apparently I was in labor. When I got to the hospital, I was immediately sentenced to strict bed rest in trendelenberg (bed where head is lower than the legs) and placed on a monitor. The babies were fine, but I was contracting, 2 cm dilated, and my bag of water was bulging out of my cervix. I was started on magnesium to stop the contractions and it was awful. Then I needed to have a cerclage placed to close the cervix. It was extremely risky because the bag could rupture during the procedure. I had to be awake during it and was lying almost completely upside down, listening to every word the doctors said. The procedure was successful and I was back to Labor and Delivery, lying upside down. I wasn’t allowed to even sit up for a second. As hard as that was, I would have done anything to save my babies.

I had to stay in the hospital, on complete bed rest, with some awful medications to stop contractions for as long as possible. But at exactly 24 weeks, just 2 1/2 weeks later, the contractions were worse and I felt some fluid or mucus come out. It was just after midnight July 25, 2005. My doctor came in and told me to call my husband. I couldn’t stop crying. My doctor said this was it, they couldn’t stop the labor. He told me to try to hold on until the morning, at 8am, when they would have a full staff from the NICU to be there. At 7 am the pains were so bad, I felt that if I moved, a baby was about to come out. But I fought against all urges to push and tried so hard to keep them in. The doctor checked me again and I was 10 cm. We couldn’t wait any longer. I had an emergency c-section with what looked like at least 20 people in the OR and my wonderful husband by my side as always telling me it would be ok.

At 7:10am, Ryan Sebastian was born, immediately followed by Brandon Robert, and at 7:11am, Jessica Susan. They were intubated and whisked away to the NICU. I didn’t know what to think. I was wheeled down to see them once they were settled. Ryan was 1 lb 3 oz, Brandon was 1 lb 5 oz and Jessica was 1 lb 4 oz. They were hooked up to monitors, vents and IVs. They were so tiny but so perfect.

The next 30 days were full of ups and downs, but mostly downs. But my babies were fighters and had made it through the hardest days, I thought. But Jessica had been the sickest and went into renal failure. We got the call at 2am to come see her because she wasn’t going to make it. I finally got to hold my little girl but it was bitter sweet. She continued to fight for 2 more days. We went to the NICU everyday and visited all 3 babies and then sat and watched Jessi in case she was going to leave us. Although we knew she didn’t have much of a chance, we still couldn’t imagine losing her. We were asked to sign a DNR (do not resusitate), but I just couldn’t do it. No parent should ever have to make that kind of decision about a baby.

Then 2 days after that horrible 2am call, we got another one at 7am. But it was not about Jessica, it was Ryan. What! I wasn’t prepared for that. His heart had stopped but they got it started again. At 7:45 am they called back to tell us he had died. I was shocked and in disbelief. This wasn’t supposed to happen. We went to the NICU. I got to hold Ryan for the first time. He was my little wiggler, but now he was still. He had already had quite a personality and I would imagine what he would be like when he was older, but now I would never get to see that. My husband, my parents and I held him and said our goodbyes. I told him how sorry I was that I couldn’t keep him in longer. I was sorry that he had to go through all of this, needles, vents, tubes, and after 30 days of it, that was it. The nurse came to take Ryan back and at 11:45 am, just as they took Ryan away, I was told that Jessica has died. How am I supposed to do that all over again…say goodbye to 2 babies. The pain was unbearable..it still is as I write this today. I have a constant pain in my heart and stomach that I can’t imagine ever getting any better. We buried them together in the same casket. At least they have each other.

Brandon is still in the NICU, it has been almost 9 weeks so far. He is doing well. I know he has 2 angels watching over him. I still go to the NICU everyday to see my one triplet. It is so hard to be there. But Brandon keeps me going. Everyday is so hard and my life will never be the same. I am hoping things will get better once Brandon comes home. I miss my babies…I miss them so much. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. It doesn’t always seem real. I’m constantly wishing and what if-ing about how it should have been. I love my babies so much. My 2 year old is too young to understand. I try not to let her see me cry. She never got to see them because she is too young to be allowed into the NICU. I wish I could take a break from all this pain. But Ashley and Brandon, my wonderful and amazing husband, and my supportive family keep me going and my 2 little angels, Ryan and Jessica, are always in my heart.

Erin, Mommy to Angels Aidan and Ellen

My husband has wanted children since before we were married. After one year of marriage, I decided it was time to start a family. I got pregnant in March of 2005. My husband and I were so excited, we only had to try once and we were pregnant. My first trimester went very smoothly, I had no morning sickness and wasn’t very tired. I kept thinking to myself, “Am I really pregnant?”

I naturally assumed we were having one baby. At my 16 week checkup my doctor noticed how large I was. A week later we went in for an ultrasound only to discover TWINS!!!! We were so excited. I still get excited just remembering the day we found out. Both babies looked healthy, no defects were detected. The only thing noted was Aidan was 1 week bigger than Ellen. Nobody mentioned this was a problem. My doctor didn’t even come in to see me that day.

A week and a half later I started having false contractions. This was my first pregnancy and I had no idea what to expect. I went back to my doctor who said I shouldn’t worry about contractions unless they became regular. I was to find out that contractions were not the problem. The doctor flipped through my file and told me my AFP test came back positive. She said that most positive AFP tests were false positive. I tried not to worry. She also casually stated, “Oh, but there is quite a size difference.” She told me not to worry, but I had a feeling this was bad.

At week 19 we went in for a Level II ultrasound. I had been positively sick with worry the past two weeks. I tried to convince myself that all was well. It wasn’t. The ultrasound confirmed our worst fears. Ellen had spina bifida, a mild case though. This wasn’t even the worst of it. She also had a velementous cord connection (poor cord connection to the placenta). She was undersized, and the doctors did not think she would make it. My husband and I were crushed. Aidan was doing very well, he was at the 83% percentile as far a size, a little larger than his gestational age. Nobody said this was a problem.

On Thursday after work, my husband came home to find me in a very bad mood. I broke down crying and told him that I had not felt any kicking movement all day. We called the doctor who said I should get a good meal in and rest to see if that stimulated any movement. It didn’t. The next day, my husband insisted that we go in to the hospital to find out what was going on. I didn’t want to go, I didn’t want to hear the truth.. my babies were dead. It was confirmed, they indeed had died. This was the absolute worst day of our lives. I still have trouble believing all this happened.

My doctors think that my babies were sharing blood between their placentas, TTTS. The odd thing is that my babies were fraternal twins, not identical. I didn’t think this could happen between fraternal twins. The cord connection may have had something to do with it. We are still awaiting the autopsy results to confirm what happened.

It has only been two weeks since my Aidan and Ellen became my angel babies. Most days are sad for me. I cry a lot, wish a lot and just feel hopeless. I know in time I will start to feel better. I don’t think this feeling will ever go away, I am going to have to learn to live with it. I love my babies and I know they love me. They are safe in heaven somewhere watching over me and my husband.

Erin, Mommy to Angels Aidan and Ellen

 

Our daughters, Amelia & Jaydyn

It was the day before my husband’s birthday when we found out we were expecting twins. We were so excited. Because we had a twin pregnancy, our next appointment was with the obstetrician at the high risk unit was one month later. I’ll never forget that day.

I did not know what to expect from the ultrasound, so we did not pick up on the ‘problem’. The babies were fine, which was my only concern at the time. I left the ultrasound thinking everything was OK. We were put in a room to wait for the doctor. The nurse asked us a bunch of questions. I remember her saying “Oh my, you should be sitting” and then guiding me to the bed. It was only when the doctor came in that I realized something was wrong. We went from the highest high, to the lowest low in seconds.

My cervix was effaced and one of the membranes had dropped. I was only 20 weeks along. What exactly he said is a blur. I asked him about the babies chances and he said less than 10%. My husband and I were in shock. He immediately admitted me into the hospital, bed rest with my feet higher than my head. We were hopeful that the membrane would go back into my uterus so they could put a stitch in my cervix. The babies were doing well.

The ultrasound two days later showed no change so I went back to my room. Not long later, I went to the washroom and thought I saw my mucus plug so I called the nurse. She reassured me that it was not what I saw. When I laid back down, I could not get comfortable. I switched sides 3 or 4 times then felt a big gush of fluid. I remember the doctor checking to see if it was in fact my water that broke and saying ‘it’s no use.’ I was so angry at her choice of words.

Shortly after that mild contractions started and I was brought to labour & delivery. The next morning, July 21, 2001, I delivered Amelia Margaret. I remember being excited, sad and scared all at the same time. Amelia lived an hour and forty minutes. We spent every minute of her life loving her, holding her. I remember her grabbing a hold of my finger. She had such a strong grip. I felt so helpless. She was a perfect baby, just tiny. The nurses took pictures, did her foot prints and dressed her in a little baby gown.

We were so sad yet hopeful that the second baby would be OK since she was in a separate sack. The doctor said we should induce the second delivery. We did not want to and debated it all day. Amelia’s placenta still had not come out and an infection was starting as a result. They said I should be induced or I would be at risk It was out of our hands. We went ahead with the induction.

The next morning, July 22, 2001, Jaydyn Eileen was born. She lived just over an hour. We spent every minute of her life loving her, holding her. I remember her gasping when the cold stethoscope was put on her chest. I wanted so much to be able to breath for her. Pictures and foot prints were taken and she too was dressed in a baby gown.

We had a naming ceremony in the hospital and a funeral three days later. I’m very grateful to the nurses at the hospital. One in particular guided us so well throughout this period. They encouraged us to spend time with the girls, of which they took many pictures. My daughters lived a very short time, but they are real and our time with them means so much to me.

Eighteen months, one stitch in my cervix and way too many blood thinner injections later, Amelia and Jaydyn’s baby brother Kent was born February 7, 2003.

Amelia and Jaydyn are part of our reality and will always be part of our lives.

Amelia Margaret Religa Nesrallah
Born/Died: July 21, 2001
and 
Jaydyn Eileen Religa Nesrallah
Born/Died: July 22, 2001

You were with us such a short time. You are forever in our hearts. We miss you!

Angels on my pillow

My husband and I were college sweethearts who married one week after graduation. We have spent the last seven and a half years as a double income no kids family. We finally decided to take the plunge into mother and fatherhood back in June.

I got pregnant right away and 8 weeks later I found out I was very pregnant with twins. My pregnancy was normal (according to my OB). How would I know? This was my first time in this ballgame. Around 18 weeks I found out that I was carrying identical twin boys and everything appeared fine. They were developing beautifully with no problems. Since I was getting really uncomfortable around this time, I decided to resign from my full time job and rest. I resigned on Monday and lost my babies on Wednesday of the same week.

That Wednesday night was very normal. My husband and I ate dinner and even went for a swim at our gym. I went to bed and woke up an hour later with terrible pain in my lower belly. I called the doctor and my water broke while I was on the phone with her. Since I was 20 weeks along I immediately knew what this meant for my babies. We rushed to the ER and minutes later I was told that there was no chance either of my boys would make it. I suffer from an incompetent cervix and it had spontaneously opened that October 27th with absolutely no warning. In fact just a week or two prior my cervix had been perfect. Apparently with this problem it can happen in a matter of minutes.

The next morning I delivered my boys vaginally. We held them and cried and had the hospital chaplain baptize them with our tears, which were plentiful. A week later we buried them and had a memorial service to honor their memory. We planted a bulb garden in our back yard with flowers that will bloom around their due date which was projected to be March 16, 2005.

Each day is a struggle to survive emotionally. I know that things will get easier and the only thing that gives me comfort is knowing that I will see them again in heaven. It helps to picture them sleeping beside me, angels on my pillow at night, watching over me, stroking my hair and telling me how much they love me. My heart goes out to the mommies and daddies here on earth with empty arms. Someday we will hold our babies in heaven.

Kristie, Black Mountain, NC

Story of Loss

I have read all your stories on the loss of twins so I thought I would share mine. They say that all things happen for a reason and I do believe that. At Christmas time of 2003 my husband and I had decided we were going to be apart for a while. We had been trying to get pregnant for a while with no baby in sight.

Finally we decided we would get back together and make it work. Well on 02-04-04 I took a home pregnancy test. The results were positive. A week later I go into the OBGYN for a pregnancy test and it comes out positive. I was the most excited person in the world. They decided I was far enough along to put me on the ultrasound right then and I found out I was having identical twins.

It was a long couple of months after that. They had found fluid on the back of Baby B’s neck and told me right then that he wasn’t going to make it. If he dies, since they were identical, Baby A would die as well. They monitered me up to 23 weeks. It was detemined after that they were both going to be healthy little boys.

A week later I started having problems with a pink mucus coming out when I used the bathroom. I went to the doctor and the hospital and they all told me that it was normal. I knew something was wrong with my pregnancy but they thought I was crazy. 3 days after being monitered in a hospital all night long I went in to pre-term labor. The labor gave no warning, there was no pain. The amniotic sack had made its way down my cervix. It is called an hour-glass labor. Needless to say I had my babies on June 19th 2004. Their names were Josh and Jace. Unfortunately they only lived 2 weeks. Jace died on July 3rd and Josh died on July 6th.

I will say that as a mother those were two of the best weeks of my life, and two of the worst weeks. I do know that now me, my husband and my daughter have 2 angels that watch over us always.

Dareth, Marshville, N.C.

My Pregnancy

April 10th 2004, I had been very tired all week so I decided to take a pregnancy test. It was positive. My husband and I were elated and very surprised to be having another baby. It was the day before my son’s second birthday.

I had started having a lot of braxton-hicks contraction beginning about 4 weeks into the pregnancy. I had a lot of faintness for the first trimester and was very glad to see it go as I entered my fourth month. After that everything went easily. I focused on educating myself so I could have a vaginal birth after c-section. I took a nap everyday with my son and ate a wonderful diet.

I was very interested in hiring a midwife, but my father and husband encouraged me to go get checked with an OBGYN just for security. I finally made an appointment with a doctor at 16 weeks. They couldn’t get me in for another 4 weeks so by the time I was seen I was already 20 weeks. Everything checked out fine. The nurse had a really hard time finding a heartbeat, she said my placenta was attached right in front blocking the baby’s heartbeat. She finally got one it was about 150, she mentioned that it was probably a girl since the rate was so high.

My husband and I bought a bigger house to accommodate the new arrival. I began buying some baby clothes and making preparations. At 21.5 weeks I felt a good kick. It was so comforting because I was feeling so little movement this pregnancy. I’m so glad I remember it well because it would be the last kick I would feel. That weekend we moved. Thursday I felt some really strange pains in my belly. I had no contractions that day so I wasn’t worried. I stayed up late working on a birth plan. I got up about 3 am to go to the bathroom and noticed a blob of pink mucous which really scared me, I had never had any kind of bleeding with either pregnancy so this wasn’t normal for me.

Friday morning I decided to put myself on bedrest but I still didn’t feel right. I checked my cervix and almost fainted when I realized I was dilated to 2 cm. I finally told my husband what was going on and we went to the hospital. When we got to the ER I told them I was 23 weeks and in labor. They wheeled me up to OB . The fetal monitor in my room didn’t work right so the nurse tried a Doppler. She got a heartbeat (which turned out to be mine) so I thought it was just preterm labor or maybe an incompetent cervix. Three and a half hours after we arrived at the hospital they wheeled me back down to the sonogram room. I hadn’t had one yet this pregnancy. Immediately she told me we had two babies! Not really a surprise, twins are very frequent in my husband’s family. After a few minutes I asked her if she was finding a heartbeat. She said “no.” I was stunned.

We went back to my room and the doctor came in and explained that we had twins, that were in the same sac and that they had died. He thought they had probably been gone for a while. He gave me the option to induce labor now or wait. We wanted to wait because the next day was our 5th anniversary. Unfortunately my blood work came back and said that I had an infection so we had to stay to be induced and receive some antibiotics. I was so nervous. I kept having anxiety attacks and my blood pressure would spike really high. The nurses were very compassionate as well as my doctor. They did everything they could to make me comfortable, including stopping the medicine for a few hours so I could have a good meal and some rest. My epidural only took effect on the right side of my body so I was in some pain.

It was Sunday at 1pm that my babies were born. They were born intact with the membranes and the placenta. It didn’t hurt at all physically just emotionally. The doctor removed them and cut the cords which were very long and knotted. The babies were 3.8 and 3.6 ounces. Both were 7 inches long. They were one quarter the weight they should have been. My husband and I held them for a short time. Now I wish I would have held them a lot longer but I was so shocked at the time I just couldn’t.

We had a funeral four days later. We found out they were girls and named them. We found some beautiful dresses and tiny teddy bears. I hand made a blanket for them and wrote them a letter to put in their casket. We buried them on the family farm near our home. They have a beautiful grave site that I take care of myself. I can visit them anytime and do whatever I want there.

Jessica, Illinois

Loss of Twins

My name is Betty. I am on my second marriage to a wonderful man whom has no children. I have two children, an 11yr old daughter and 10yr old son, from a previous marriage. My story is that my husband and I had been trying to conceive for about a year and a half. In October of 2002 we found that my husband had a low sperm count and I had gone for an Hysteralpingogram [test to try and unblock fallopian tubes] and we were waiting for more tests to be performed. In November I had come down with a cold and put off going for a pregnancy test. Because of the odds who would think that it could happen? Well, I took a [pregnancy] test because I didn’t want to take all the cold medicines without knowing first if I could be pregnant. I couldn’t believe it..it was positive (I bought two more and they turned out positive too!). Then it was confirmed by my doctor.

I was really crampy and thought it was my period coming. They said it was perfectly normal but scheduled an ultrasound anyway. So there we were at our first ultrasound. Ahhh to see our baby’s first heartbeats at 6wks. How proud we were…. but in the corner was something else..another BABY! Twins..We were so happy.

The weeks went on and on January 21,2003 at 13 1/2 weeks pregnant with no complications, our world came crumbling down. I woke up that morning to a little mucas spot so I called the doctor. They weren’t too concerned but said if it would make me feel better to come in. So as two different doctors tried to find heart beats, there were none to be found.

I was rushed to the hospital for an ultrasound and as the pictures came on the screen, there were my twins. How beautiful with little heads, hands and feet..but no heart beats! They were identical and shared the same sac. The only explanation that was given to us was that they got tangled in their umbilical cords. One baby was bigger than the other so we believe that he/she lived longer.

We are taking it day to day. Each of us is grieving our own way. And we think of them often. Thank you for hearing our story.

Betty

Loss of Twins

On December 16, 2002, an ultrasound revealed that I was having twin girls. Sure I was shocked at first, but I was elated over the news. I had no idea that twelve days later my beautiful babies would be no more.

On December 25, after opening presents with my family, I discovered that I was bleeding. Fear and dread overtook me. I knew that I should not be bleeding this late in the pregnancy. I met the doctor at the hospital. He checked me, and performed another ultrasound. The babies were fine. He told me to go home and stay on bed rest for a week. However, I continued to bleed throughout the next day.

I started having back pains, but for some reason I did not connect the pain to labor. I called the doctor’s office again. I was instructed to get to the hospital. After examining me, the doctor informed my husband and I that I had dilated 2 centimeters. He told me that maybe they could save one of the babies if they could stop the contractions by suturing my cervix shut.

That wasn’t what I wanted to hear, but the chance of having at least one was better than loosing both. From Thursday, December 26, until Saturday December 28, my doctor did all he could to save my girls. Family and friends prayed throughout the ordeal.

At 10:26, Caitlyn was born. She weighed 15 and 1/4 ounces. Six minutes later Jailyn was born. She weighed 14.9 ounces. My angels were too premature. Their little hearts beat for awhile after they were born, and they tried to breathe. There was no hope. They could not survive outside the womb. I carried my babies for 21 weeks and four days. Up until delivery, I could feel them moving.

I miss my babies every hour of the day. I feel so overwhelmed with guilt sometimes at the loss of twins.

Dee, Alabama